We lean on how something feels when making a fast judgment.
More quotesThe researchers begin with something modest: two strangers watch a funny clip together, then disclose more and appear more intimate than pairs who watched neutral footage. Through shared laughter, each person gets a scrap of social information. We noticed the same oddity. We can relax half an inch.
A company cannot simply apply that result by adding a gag to the payment-failure email. The customer and company arrive with different roles, different stakes and possibly different ideas about what deserves a laugh.
Consider three messages after a service outage. With “Whoops, our servers are having a nap”, the writer asks the stranded customer to enjoy the company’s whimsy. “We broke it; here’s what happened” uses a light touch while accepting responsibility. “You lot certainly gave the system a workout” makes the customer the target. Only one of those improves the relationship.
The repair team writes the plain facts first: impact, cause, remedy, timing. Then it tries one human line acknowledging the absurdity. During review, the team keeps the line for customers whose work was delayed and removes it for customers whose money became inaccessible.
This requires judgement, which is why organisations prefer a tone-of-voice rule. Teams can apply rules at scale. Judgement requires someone to consider the moment.
The final message contains no punchline. A support agent uses one later, after the customer has their refund and makes the first joke. They both laugh. The order matters.