Expectations change how the same experience feels.
More quotesA coin is tossed. Strangers are told they share an artistic preference. Within minutes, “our lot” seem more agreeable. Tribal loyalty apparently offers remarkably quick same-day delivery. The speed is both ridiculous and useful. A coloured bib can turn strangers into teammates before anybody has exchanged a biography. A postcode creates instant conversation. Supporting the same football club permits affection between people whose only other shared belief may be that the referee is blind. Belonging lowers the cost of trust.
Then the accounting becomes crooked. Our delay had context; theirs proves incompetence. Our unpleasant supporter is an exception; their unpleasant supporter reveals the entire species. A random label begins collecting moral evidence.
The funny thing is how many incompatible tribes one person can hold. The rival fan is also a neighbour. The irritating colleague shares a customer. Two enemies over operating systems discover they both loathe the same airline. A boundary that looked morally significant becomes optional when another identity cuts across it. Public rankings push the other way: a mild difference acquires colours, a table and eventually merchandise. Before despising the other lot, inspect the membership rule. Birthplace, payroll and software preference are only marginally more dignified than Tajfel’s coin.